Posts Tagged ‘Black Community’

Why Would a White Man Ever Even “Look” at a Black Woman

     Recently the media had a field day with the ads and billboards posted by Georgia Right to Life and Radiance Foundation, anti-abortion groups in Georgia.  (Read the NY Times article here  The campaign aims at discouraging Black women, the population allegedly having abortions at a rate higher than any other ethnic or racial group, from using abortion as a method of birth control by classifying Black children as “endangered species”.   These groups took advantage of the “Negro project” started by Margaret Sanger, the founder of Planned Parenthood, which aimed at killing as many Black children as possible to save humanity.  Georgia Right to Life states that Black women, particularly in New York, Texas, Maryland, Mississippi and Georgia, have more than 50% of the abortions despite the fact that they make up way less than these populations in these states.  They mention how most abortion clinics are located in the urban areas and that this is by design. 

    Well, this past week there were stories about the wealth, or worth, of Black women and the Herpes infection rate of Black women.  The articles on Black women’s wealth indicates that, compared to White women, Asian women and Latin, single Black women are worth the least, $100 on average, particularly for women aged 30-49.  And even though their wealth supposedly increases dramatically over time, particularly once they marry and once they reach their Golden years, their wealth still lags behind that of women of other racial groups.  Based on a recent study, well 2007 data, the Insight Center for Community and Economic Development (read here, Black women are more likely to have more debt, to not own major assets, to work in the service industry, are more likely to have been a victim of the subprime lending debacle and to rely more on Social Security benefits, which is thought to be the basis for the huge disparity in worth.

     The stories about the Herpes plague is even more disturbing.  According to the, Black women, allegedly, make up almost half (48%) of those infected with the Herpes virus, more than double that of Black men, according to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention.  The reasons are claimed to be the susceptibility of Blacks to the virus and the fact that Blacks are less likely to have it diagnosed, since the symptoms are not as overt.

     I hope at this point that we all see the pattern here.  I mean, there are a plethora of articles, stories, etc. about how Black women should broaden their horizons and date outside of their race. But then not even a few days later, a barrage of negative statistics are disseminated to make us appear undesirable and unattractive to ANY MAN, let alone a man of another race.  I, myself, believe that we should remain within the Black community anyhow, but think it’s interesting how they “build us up, only to break us down again”.  I mean I am already reading blog posts where White men are emphatic in stating that there is no way that they would date a Black woman given the paucity of her assets and the probability of her having Herpes.  They don’t take the time to explore the validity of these so-called studies, and why should they, they just believe what they read and relegate Black women to the “stay the Hell away from” class.  This is not a coincidence, White women do not want Black women even looking at “their” men and they are rather conspicuous in their efforts.  Well, they can have them because, if nothing else, I wouldn’t want to spend our most intimate moments trying to dispel any of this negative information.

Little to No Traffic for Online Search of “Black Family”

     I know we have been inundated with news reports, articles, blogs, etc. about  Black family, Black love, Black marriage and Black relationships/dating, in the past few months.  Topics ranged from the negative images, the paucity of any images, on the these issues in the media or the arts; the regressive or dysfunctional state of the Black community; the recent trends, studies, data and statistics regarding these-and the list goes on and on.  The point is, everyone and their Mama has spoken a word or two about what is going on with the Black family

     The thing I found most interesting is that I have been doing some extensive research on the internet recently and guess what!  there is little to absolutely NONE traffic on these very topics.  I mean I used every tool available to do a keyword analysis, web traffic analytics and other such mechanisms and apparently not many people care to know what is going on with the Black family.  Well, I should say that not many people in the world of Google, Yahoo or other major search engines, care to know.  This is alarming, no wait….it’s downright a travesty!  How can this be?  I mean with Monique winning an Oscar for partaking in the portrayal of a matriarch in the most dysfunctional Black family, while Sandra Bullock is regaled for playing the White mother who saves a wayward Black kid, if nothing else this should have sparked some more interest.  I mean the Black family is on perpetual attack and no one cares!  Am I the only one who feel like a pandemic is plagued our community?  Does anyone else care that if we do not infiltrate the media sources with our concerns, our demands, our downright insistence that we change the direction that the Black family and therefore the Black community will become extinct?  We are an endangered species do you have any idea what this means?

“The Conversation”

     I recently read Hill Harper’s “The Conversation”.   Although I would have appreciated more of an in-depth analysis of the problems and more insightful solutions I really appreciated the overall premise.  I too think that many of our social, economic and spiritual ills can be addressed by talking openly and honestly to each other and thus encourage that approach to eradicating the prejudices, the negative stereotypes and the chasm that exists between Black men and Black women.  However, I believe that the best way to get someone to listen is to appeal to issues most sensitive to them and reading the book I did not quite understand who he was targeting, Black men, Black women or both.  I kept trying to read it from a Black man’s point of view, thinking that he was trying to reach them but could not help but internalize his points from a Black woman’s perspective.   Not to say that he could not be speaking to both, I was just hoping he was not jumping on that “let me speak to you desperate Black women, ready to pull out all stops to get your Black man” bandwagon!  I mean if you surf the web, turn on the television or strike up a conversation at the hair salon everyone is talking about the plight of single Black women.  I think it’s imperative, that Black men reach out to Black men.  Black women can harmoniously sing the “we need our Black men to step up and commit to us” song, but obviously they are hearing us. 

     Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think Black women don’t have a responsibility in getting Black men to hear us and move in the direction of healing, restoring and reclaiming our families and relationships.  On the contrary, I think Black women should accept some of the blame in the discord that currently exists between us.  But I think our problems are, although part and parcel of the larger issues, are somewhat distinct and therefore should be dealt with differently.  The common denominator is our lack of trust, respect, appreciation and candor for each other, but our reasoning or rationale diverges.  So although we can confront our common issues, concomitantly, we don’t necessarily have to use the same strategy.  So I appreciate the Hill Harpers trying to reach the masses, but I believe in tailoring the solutions based on the interests of the target, not the “one size fits all” approach.  Hill was very insightful, he has a plethora of female friends and some good natured dudes in his circle who were all instrumental in his getting the message across, but I would have loved to if he had narrowed the focus. 

     Overall, it is clear that we need to start this conversation.  We need to be able to communicate openly and honestly about our respective insecurities, fears, doubts, etc. and begin to work toward healing.  I mean we desperately need to open our hearts, open our minds and talk TO each other and not AT each other.  I must admit, my head was spinning with all the platforms from which we can spring board  these conversations but we must take baby steps.

Black Single Mother Household Worth Millions to Advertisers

     Last night the 2010 Superbowl aired and it made tv history by having the most viewers ever!  There were several tv ads, many of them were Frito-Lays where they advertised Doritos.  One of the Doritos commercials, which was actually rated as one of the favorites by Superbowl viewers, was very controversial to many of us!  Yes, it was the one where there was a Black single mother whose son slapped her Black male date for checking out his mother as she walked across the room.   These depictions have been proliferating in the media, in musical lyrics, movie scripts, television scenes, etc. and now television commericals.   And this was not just any Doritos commercial, but a Superbowl ad that Frito-Lays paid millions to air with several million viewers watching.   This is what these marketers are subconsciously engraining in society’s psyche, that Black single mothers is the “norm”. 

     We all know that data and statistics indicate that only 1 out of every 3 Black children born, as 2002, are born to married couples, the other 2 of 3 are born to single mothers, allegedly more than double that of White children.  However, the reality is that there are more White single mothers than Black single mothers, the difference is that many of those White single mothers are divorced whereas many of the Black single mothers were never married.  Furthermore, Black boys raised by single mothers  are more inclined to go to prison, drop out of school, live in poverty and become dependent on drugs/alcohol as opposed to White boys raised by their single mothers.  The Black single mothers have a much tougher time rearing their sons because of their limited resources and limited support system, non-preferential treatment by state/local governments, sex discrimination by employers and negative societal expectations whereas their White counterparts do not have half of these obstacles to deal with.  This only goes to support my stance that our children need both parents, whether it be in the home or as an active parent in their lives. We are going to perpetuate the destruction of our children’s lives, and therefore the future of our community, if we allow this image to become so acceptable and so mainstream that it’s replete in music. television and movies.  We all have a duty to end it NOW!